Today is my last day in office before returning to Thailand. I always enjoy traveling to meet with ministry partners and I always enjoy experiencing the God ordained appointments which always accompany my travels (just ask my wife!) So when I awoke this morning, I was a bit surprised to sense something different than I normally feel…an unsettled feeling…and truth be told…I didn’t like it.
I have no idea how everyone else deals with those internal struggles. I know that I begin to go over a mental checklist of everything going on trying to determine where this feeling is coming from. But to no avail. I found myself two hours later, sitting in my office, still trying to figure this out and then slowly getting a different sense…one from the Spirit…’Look to Me.’
It started slowly, gently, a thought here of something that God had orchestrated that I couldn’t have done. A conversation that led to someone restoring a relationship. Then I began to see faces of kids playing outside the home which we were blessed to build for them and I could remember the sounds of their laughter. Jesus was all over that village! I suddenly could remember the walk each morning and the spot on the road that I would stop and look at this beautiful vista and pray….it was as if I was there…
And then I realized that God was calling me back to a moment with Him! A gentle reminder that sometimes in those unsettled moments we need to lean on Him…just lean…just think…not asking Him to take away all the negative things going on or our struggles, just rest against what He has already done. Remember those times that He came through and recognize that is the same God…still loving…still growing us…but that in the moment, we have the choice to look to Him. I didn’t hear Him say everything will turn out the way that I want, I hear Him say, if I am loving Him, if I am listening to His call on my life…then it will turn out for Good! His definition and meaning of Good.
And in that moment, His grace is sufficient…I will lean on Him through this trip, and this day, and He will be there too!